Serenity Prayer

God,
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to changes the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.



I wanted to share this short prayer this week for three reasons. First, I just finished reading Octavia Butler’s Parable of the Talents. Actually, I didn’t really like the book, but it did get me thinking a little bit about religion, spirituality, and the difference between the two. Second, this passage has been my favorite prayer ever since I first heard Cee-Lo read it on the Soul Food album. Lastly, there are (always) things going on around me, and events unfolding that could affect my life in the present and the near future. It’s too early to know how this will all play out, and there’s not much I can do in the meantime, other than stay focused on keeping my mind right for whatever comes next...
Pura Vida,
Drew


Random feel-good pictures...

A birthday party at the Centro de Juventude



Falafel night at Jesse's apartment

St. Patrick's Day

English Class at the Centro de Juventude 



Big Fifty

Last week I had a small personal crisis when my external hard drive decided to stop working. I’ve spilled enough tea to have learned my lesson, so now I am in the habit of backing up my computer every month. Unfortunately, I realized that all my pictures from the South Pacific, my first trip to Africa, and the time in between were only on that hard drive. Luckily, the hard drive decided that it was not dead, only in a coma. The near-death experience has given me a good excuse to dig into my entire digital photo library, organize it, and back up the back up.

As I culled through photos from the last hundred years (literally), it was easy to get sentimental about the recent and distant past. Meanwhile, I realized that my next blog post (this one) would be number 50 since I launched Live From Tomorrow in December 2009. Since then I’ve been outside of the USA more than I’ve been home, and this blog has become my journal, my microphone, my hobby, and my therapy. I’m not the most prolific blogger, but I like it that way—after all, this isn’t Twitter. I’ve actually managed to stick to my original game plan of never blogging more than once in a given week. I never want the sharing of my experiences to become more important than the experience of actually living them. Also, taking at least a few days to let my thoughts marinate always makes the story and the perspective a little juicier.

Like I said, flipping back through pictures and past entries can easily induce nostalgia. But, even more powerful is the feeling that I am truly blessed and/or lucky, whatever you choose to call it. With that in mind, I decided to reflect back on the past 49 posts to present to you:

50 Lucky & Memorable Experiences from Live From Tomorrow:
(from oldest to most recent)

1. Observing Akiko Fujita interview Vicky about the pending military buildup on Guam

2. Visiting Pagat for a day of cliff diving, cave swimming, and Chamorro history

3. Working with We Are Guahan

4. Spending a week in Fiji

5. Visiting the black iron sand beaches of Waitakere, New Zealand

6. Sitting in with Storehouse for their gig at Wine Cellar in Auckland

7. Spending a weekend in Wellington during the IRSWS

8. Experiencing an epic Palais Du Chat loft party in Auckland

9. Doing absolutely nothing productive at Rotidian Beach

10. Running my first Hash with Toby as my guide

11. Visiting Robben Island with Sparks as my guide

12. Deejaying with Miss H at the Waiting Room in Cape Town

13. Finding inner peace at Kirstenbosch National Gardens

14. Meeting the Japanese referee crew in Cape Town Airport

15. Sitting next to Captain America at the USA’s opening match against England

16. Touring the Westbury Township with Sophia Williams-de Bruyn and family

17. Attending the USA v Slovenia WC match at Ellis Park in Johannesburg

18. Observing a Dutch National Soccer Team training session

19. Hanging out at Sakhumzi in Soweto, watching South Africa beat France

20. Attending the USA v Algeria WC match in Pretoria

21. Running a free soccer clinic for Black Diamonds F.C. in the Alexandra Township

22. Enjoying VVIP status at the USA v Ghana match, courtesy of Kgosi Leruo

23. Running into my old college roommate at a random cafe in Melville

24. Getting a tour of the African Romance Diamonds headquarters

25. Attending the WC Championship Match between Spain and some other team from Europe

26. Forming a human heart while Adrian flew over in an airplane with his girlfriend on Valentine's Day

27. Helping to organize the Mandela Day Project with the UJ OCE

28. Spending a week in Moçambique with Grupo Desportivo de Manica

29. Experiencing my first Christmas in July party, courtesy of Niamh

30. Spending a weekend in Dullstroom, courtesy of Craig and Nana

31. Spending a week as a guest of the Royal Bafokeng Nation and staying with Sue and Charles

32. Attending the UJ Women’s Day Conference and hearing Graça Machel speak

33. Braving a trip to Santini’s, an Afrikaaner stronghold, for a Sokkie lesson

34. Getting a farewell serenade from the Lebone ladies singing group

35. Being welcomed into the family at Wits University F.C. and the University of Johannesburg

36. Getting my Invitation Letter to Serve in Cape Verde

38. Attending the NSCAA Advanced National Diploma Course

37. Living jazz at JazzCamp 2011 and the Decompression

39. Enjoying Father´s Day, Jaime's birthday, and a 4th of July / Going Away party in the Bay

40. Taking a field trip to the Tarrafal Concetration Camp on Santiago

41. Co-facilitating a community meeting in my host village, Fonte Lima

42. Walking and running through Serra Malagueta Natural Park

43. Attending my (first) Swearing In Ceremony

44. Finding Mia and smuggling her onto the plane to São Vicente in a purse

45. Hosting a beautiful Thanksgiving Dinner, my first ever without any family members

46. Attending and surviving W.A.I.S.T. in Senegal

48. Getting showered with Haikus from around the world

47. Experiencing Carnaval in Mindelo, and hosting great people from all over

49. Hosting my Dad and Lita for a week on Santiago, São Vicente, and Santo Antão

50. Leitão

Last weekend we celebrated our friend’s birthday with cake and drinks on Saturday, followed by brunch and the beach on Sunday. Cathryn is technically a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer (RPCV)*, except after completing her service and going back to the states, she un-returned back to Cape Verde. Now she lives here with her boyfriend, and the two of them have had my back since I arrived. We called ahead the day before to Santo André Bistro & Bar and told them to have enough pig ready for seven people. The leitão** was juicy, the caipirinhas were legit, and the beach was an ideal spot to enjoy the food coma. Until the next feast...

Pura Vida,

Drew



*We don't use the term "former Peace Corps Volunteer." We're kinda like a gang... you know? Blood in, blood out. Once you complete your service you become a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer, and that's what you are for the rest of your life.

**Suckling Pig... that one's for you, Sr. Vallar.

God Don't Make Mistakes

It’s hard to admit, but honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Since I first found out that Peace Corps would be closing its Cape Verde Program later this year, I have been through too many emotional and psychological stages to count. At first, I was cynically unimpressed with the decision. Then I was indignant and pissed off. After a few weeks of venting and a cooling off period, I began to refocus myself on the decision at hand: whether or not to transfer.

Now that I’ve made the decision to move to Mali in June, I find myself in a surprising state of mind: happiness. With all due love and respect to everyone and everything that I’ll leaving behind in Cape Verde, I wouldn’t change things if I could... which is convenient, because I can’t. There’s probably a few shrinks out there that would argue that this attitude is just my psychological defense mechanism for coping with a potentially traumatic experience. So be it—whatever works. I don’t believe in predestination, but I'm a big fan of the expression, "God don't make mistakes!" More importantly, I don’t believe in reverse time travel, regrets, or woulda-shoulda-coulda’s. Once something is done, it’s done.

Since making my decision, I have been more at peace with my service in Cape Verde than I ever have since arriving last summer. Surprisingly, I have hardly thought about Mali since writing my last post. Instead, I’ve found it so much easier to stay present and focused on making the most of last three months here. Luckily, there’s been a few things to make the present that much sweeter. Sometimes it takes a visitor or two (or more) to help you appreciate all the amazing things that you have around you. Fortunately, the last few weeks have brought some of the best visitors a boy could ever ask for. The head count during Carnaval included out of town guests from Washington, DC, Senegal, The Gambia, and the Cape Verdean islands of Santo Antão, Boavista, and Santiago. I never blogged about Carnaval because when the dust settled, I had other things on my mind. So, instead of rehashing the experience, I just want to share a few pics.

If you are interested in what Carnaval actually looked and felt like (as opposed to me and folks partying), then you HAVE to visit my friend's photo-blog. Bob Toomy is a fellow volunteer here in Mindelo, and among many other things, he is an amazing photographer. Here's a little sample:

After Carnaval I headed to the main island, Santiago, to hang out for a few days before my Dad and Lita landed. I only meant to visit Cidade Velha for a few hours, but two days later I was still trying to pry myself away from my new favorite spot in the country.

 

Then I was blessed with a cross-Atlantic visit from the family, which could not have come at a better time. Having them in town was a great excuse to visit some great places and great people...

Praia...

Assomada, and my host family in Fonte Lima...

 

Orgãos...

Cidade Velha (again)...

One highlight was my first ferry adventure to Santo Antão. All I can say is, “Damn, that was some good grogue and cheese!” I’m looking forward to working in a longer visit to the island before I move.

 

Earlier this week I handed in my formal letter of “resignation” to my supervisor and counterparts at work. As always, they are behind me, and support my decision completely. Hopefully, I can make my last three months here into the best ones yet.

Pura Vida,

Drew

As The Dust Settles

This is the challenge that I signed up for. When I first applied to the Peace Corps, I knew that I was willing to meet the all of the Core Expectations of the organization. Since then, those expectations have not changed, nor have mine. I am still ready for a full term of 27 months. I am still committed to improving the quality of life of the people with whom I live and work. Most importantly, I am willing to go where the Peace Corps asks me to go.

When I boarded the plane in July, 2011, and when I officially swore in as a Volunteer in September, I hardly expected to be leaving Cape Verde less than one year later. But then again, I tried my best not to expect anything. The one thing I knew for sure was that an Early Termination was not in the cards. Last time I checked, “Interrupted Service” can be found under the heading of “Early Termination” in the Peace Corps Volunteer Handbook. Call it what you want, but that is simply not what I signed up for.

What did I sign up for? Why do I want to continue my service? Of course I have always valued and engaged in volunteerism, but there are plenty of people in need back home in Oakland, California. Of course I love to travel, and to live abroad, but there are plenty of other ways to see the world. So, why is it still Peace Corps for me? The honest answer is: the challenge. Before leaving home, I often thought about what I wanted to get out of the Peace Corps experience. There are the obvious concrete answers, like new language skills, and that is one of the most attractive aspects of transferring to Mali to complete my service. But beyond the tangibles, it always comes back to that abstract idea of being challenged. In other words, if I were to look back on my service with the feeling that it was really easy, I would be more than a little disappointed.

As I’ve grappled with the decision to transfer or not transfer over the last weeks, I’ve weighed so many pros and cons. I’ve made laundry lists of potential benefits and deal-breakers, looking for a bottom line to show me the right choice. But ultimately, it is not an equation or a simple SWOT analysis… it is my life. There are plenty of “what if’s” that could stop me from transferring to Mali. But honestly, I have never lived my life, or chosen my path based on “what if?” As one family member recently put it, “whatever you do, do not focus your decision making on: ‘what if in the future they stop the program [in Mali]. You have no control over that, and it’s best to make this decision in a vibe of hope and optimism.’” Understanding that truth, it becomes clear that there are endless good reasons to transfer to Mali to continue and complete my service. The need is there. The opportunity is there. The challenge is there. So I am there.

Pura Vida,

Drew

Timbuktu?

One of my earliest memories of having an interest in the world beyond my neighborhood is of playing the “Capitals” game. As in, “What’s the capital of …….?” After years of training with the help of the linoleum-esque spill-proof placemats on our kitchen table, I got to be fairly knowledgeable about these kinds of things. Even so, there were always a few places that, as kids, we never really associated with a real geographic location on the planet. In fact, we tended to use these names to refer to places that were as far away as you could imagine, and then some. Thus, in our imaginations, the only place that was more distant than China—which was actually only as day’s worth of digging away—was Timbuktu. 

The mysterious Timbuktu, center of several deceased empires, was probably my favorite pseudo-imaginary place, all the way up until high school. At that more mature age, my buddy, Joey T., introduced me to the idea of Burkina Faso, and its superbly-named capital, Oagadougou—beat that.

Ironically, here I am decades later, closer to Timbuktu than I ever imagined myself being. After almost three weeks on pins and needles, I received an invitation from Peace Corps to transfer to Mali to complete my service there. Wow. Now, I am realizing that the only thing harder than waiting for this information is figuring what to do with it.

 

I am certainly not the only one facing this decision right now. All of the 25 first-year Cape Verde volunteers in my cohort have received similar invitations to transfer—either to Mali, Benin, or Moçambique. The past few weeks have seen a flurry of back-and-forth emails and Facebook conversations, as volunteers seek to pick each other's brains, support one another, and just plain vent. Ultimately, we all know that it will be a personal decision for each of us, regardless of what the common knowledge, misinformation, or apprehensions may be.

I have until the end of this month to make my decision: to transfer or not to transfer, that is the question. If I chose not to accept the invitation to Mali, I would complete my first year of service here in Cape Verde. My official status would then be listed as “Interrupted Service,” which the Peace Corps Volunteer Handbook describes as a form of “Early Termination initiated by Peace Corps staff members, Host Country or local authorities who decide that a trainee or Volunteer should not remain in Peace Corps service due to reasons beyond his or her control,” (p. 73). In some ways it’s kind of like an honorable discharge. If I took this route, I’m pretty sure that I would end up staying in Cape Verde for another year to continue my volunteer work with the Centro da Juventude, while hopefully landing a job that would allow me to pay my relatively modest living expenses. Also, I would still be eligible for the normal benefits of being a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer, including one-year of non-competitive eligibility status if I were to apply for a federal government job.

The timing of this decision is pretty… well… interesting for me. For one, Carnaval is just around the corner (or already here, depending on when you are reading this post). It will be nice to have something to take my mind off the looming question for a few days. Plus, my body has almost recovered from W.A.I.S.T., so I think I’m ready. Then, after the festivities wrap up, I will be blessed with a cross-Atlantic visit from Lita and the Notorious D.A.D. Over the years, my dad has served me well in many capacities, including, teacher, financier, judge, jury, advocate, warden (never executioner), tour guide, and doubles partner.* Nowadays, he is more of a friend, confidant and general life consultant. It will be nice to have him close by in the days leading up to, and following, the deadline for making one of the biggest decisions of my life…** In truth, I’m not really looking for advice right now. Like I said before, the decision has to be mine. Regardless, it is helpful to bounce ideas off my peoples, be they fellow volunteers or family and friends spread across the globe. 

On that front, you guys have continued to be amazing, with supportive emails and more inspirational art therapy. Here’s the latest in our series of “Live From Tomorrow Haikus,” courtesy of my folks, Molly.

keep on keepin' on

enjoy all the adventures

the best ain't easy

 

Before I sign off, I thought it would be interesting to share with you a glimpse into my thought process as I start to tackle this decision. So, I present to you two more short lists:

3 Reasons Why I Should Stay in Cape Verde

-          Personal Commitment – Peace Corps aside, I feel like I made a personal commitment to the organization(s) that I work with in Cape Verde and the community where I live. The biggest reason for me to stay would be to see that commitment through to the end.

-          Not Moving - I hate, hate, hate, moving. Seriously, it is one my least favorite things in the world.

-          Mindelo - Mindelo é sab.***

3 Reasons Why I Should Transfer to Mali

-          The Need – Unlike Cape Verde, Mali is one of the poorest countries on the planet. About 35% of the population does not have access to clean drinking water. If I transfer, I will (be trained to) work on water sanitation projects.

-          Professional Commitment – The last thing I need on my resume is another thing that lasted for a year or so. I was really looking forward to being able to say that I worked for ______________ for more than two years. Right now, that would mean transferring to Mali to complete my service there.

-          The Challenge – If you know me, then you know that this is one of the things that make me tick on the most fundamental level. While my time in Cape Verde has brought its fair share of challenges, transferring to Mali would likely be a whole new level of “damn this is hard.” My French skills are negligible—besides, whatever language I would learn (Bambara?) has absolutely no connection to French, or any other language that I speak. Now that’s what I’m talkin´ ´bout. On top of that, I’ve never lived in a country that is landlocked, predominantly Muslim, etc., etc., etc.

Notice how I chose to keep these lists in the affirmative? In other words, I didn’t share my list of reasons why I should not do "x, y, z." But believe me: that list exists in my head, and as my roommate would say, "it tain´t purty." Without being a complete Debbie Downer, I do want to share one serious concern that will be a big influence on my decision. My big question is, “What if they decide to shut down the program in Mali, too?” Whether you call them insignificant skirmishes, isolated incidents, or a full-fledged rebellion, the reality is that there is some degree of instability in the country. Granted, the media has a tendency to exaggerate and sensationalize some of the stories coming out of Africa while ignoring others. “Besides,” you might be thinking, “Peace Corps wouldn’t transfer you to a country if they were going to shut down that program.” Unfortunately, in light of my current circumstances, I have trouble buying into the logic of that argument. Even as we speak, there are areas in Mali that are “off-limits” to the Peace Corps Volunteers that are already stationed in that country. Ironically, I'm pretty sure that one of those areas is the ever-elusive city of Timbuktu. So, maybe I’m not as close as I thought.

One thing is for sure: I won’t be making any final decisions in the next few days. I’ve got other fish to fry right now. I just bought a couple packs of face paint yesterday and the biggest question on my mind is whether to go with the simple black-and-white Dead Presidents look, or something more extravagant. When the dust settles, I will face the music and make the call. Who knows, maybe I will choose “none of the above.” Until then, I'll just be following my friend Yang's haiku-advice...

Pretty Mindelo
You won't be there for ever
Party it up NOW!!!

Pura Vida,

Drew

* We are still undefeated after dominating the non-competitive division of the Father/Son tournament at the San Francisco Tennis Club, circa 1995.

* *… thus far.

*** It’s nice here. “Sabi” (pronounced “sahb” in the North or “sah-bee” in the South) is another one of those words that is much bigger than its definition. It could mean nice, good, tasty, fun,all-gravy, or pretty much anything positive.

UPDATE: Peace Corps suspended its Volunteer Activities in Mali on April 9, 2012. Click here to read the official press release.

Haiku Therapy

In the week since my last post I have been showered with love from my folks and family around the world. You guys are amazing. Thank you for caring, thank you for reading, and thank you for reaching out to remind me that it's all going to work out perfectly, whatever that may end up looking like. Unfortunately, I have not come any closer to making a decision about what's next. I am still waiting on information from Peace Corps about the logistics and options for possibly transferring to another country to complete the second year of my service. Meanwhile, your love and support has taken so many forms, but one of you went the extra mile. So, in the continuing spirit of art therapy, I wanted to share with you an untitled haiku composed by my friend, Adriana, a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer*.

Drew, I am so sorry

enjoy the time you have left

change is beautiful

Thanks Adriana, I needed that. In the meantime, all haikus are welcome, even if they are not as sweet as this one. It could be a simple as:

Quit your crying, boy!

Luckiest man alive, right?
Let's go out swingin'.

Pura Vida,

Drew

* Adriana served as a Peace Corps Volunteer in Morocco from 2009-2011. After completing her service she stopped in Cape Verde to join us for Thanksgiving week before returning home to Queens, New York.