Before reading this post, you MUST read the recent, short article by Doug Glanville of the New York Times. Otherwise, this post will be coming out of FAR left field... Click on the link below to view the article, then read my post. Please leave a comment if anything in either article gets your wheels turning.
That's an on-point article! While I am only a legend in my own mind (a true minor leaguer), I have tasted what he's talking about while on tour. I learned a WHOLE LOT about how your placement, or image, or status, can dictate how (and how many) people treat you. I can't tell you how many times I have been completely invisible to a female (or male) until AFTER I get off stage, even when I'm not the headliner or a main part of the show. It feels like there is some weird transitive property of fame and status.
I've also watched colleagues use that status to get virtually anything and everything for free while on the road, including meals, drugs, sex, lodging, attention, etc. It didn't take me long to appreciate the path of destruction that is left in the wake. As more and more bridges get burned, and more and more friends are revealed to be just acquaintances, the person with the status pays the ultimate price... they are left empty.
It's feels good to be traveling, but to not be "on tour." In the last few weeks I've sat in a dozen different clubs, listened to a dozen different bands, and met dozens of people. The vast majority of them have no idea that I've performed in front of thousands of people, with some of their favorite artists. I would like to do some shows here before I leave, but I'm not in any rush. I find myself wondering which people, if any, will suddenly take an interest in me once I step off stage... and what their motivations will be.
In the meantime, I'm enjoying just listening to the band, and giving them their props after the show. I guess I'd rather be a groupie, than be groupied.